Fresh scent of a pining hero
by La coccinelle bleue
Summary: "I didn't care about any of it, before, it was just something that happened, it was just a person that, for all I know, just met once, I didn't want to find her, I didn't need her, until I met her, and even when I knew that she didn't feel the same, I loved her." AU!SasuSaku, One-sided, looooong ass oneshot. Soul mates. Unrequited love. Mention of NARUSAKU


Hiya!

So this 43 pages long, 19k+ words mammoth took two weeks to write, phew, the plot wouldn't leave me alone though, the general idea is based on the tumblr prompt from OTP prompts below, and also inspired by a bollywood movie I saw recently starring shahrukh khan (My favorite bollywood actor).

AU where everyone has their soulmate name written on their wrist. The name will be written when they meet each other. Alive soulmate name is written in black ink, while the dead one is written in red. Imagine Person A has Person B's name on their wrist, but Person B doesn't have Person A's name. Person A thinks Person B will have theirs, sooner or later. But one day Person B meets and falls in love with Person C, and both of them have their name written on each other's wrists. Person A is broken hearted and leaves. One day, Person A's name is written on Person B's wrist, below Person C's name. In red ink.

It's just a little something (well, maybe not so little) to dip my toe back in the water, hope you enjoy!

ps. Thank you so much for everyone who has reviewed The secret wife, I really, really, really appreciate it, it meant so much to me to see people stick with it to the very end, I know the ending didn't satisfy everyone, and I know some of you wanted an epilogue with kids and all, but I really don't like the happily ever after where they have a bunch of kids and go into the sunset together, I prefer a more real ending. Also, thank you, everyone who wished me well, with kind words and heartfelt prayers, and thank you to those of you who wished me well on my exams, very much appreciated. You are the best readers in the whole world.

* * *

Seven year old Sasuke wakes up at exactly seven o'clock in the morning, five seconds before his mother knocks on his door. She stands in his doorway, and gently calls out that it's time to wake up.

He sits up on his bed, ready to swing his legs over the side when a twinge draws his attention to his left wrist, he frowns and resists the urge to scratch, the skin there is already red and welted, and smeared with thin streaks of dry blood.

He twists his wrist away from his mother's line of vision, and stands. As usual, it is impossible to keep anything from his mother. She is beside him in a second, her hands envelop his left hand and she begins her inspection.

"Sasuke-kun," She exclaims, "What have you done to your skin?"

He wants to pull his hand away but knows not to. "It's itchy."

She gently prods at the scratches, and he flinches. "Sorry." She murmurs. "How long has it been itchy?"

His right shoulder rises and then drops in half-shrug, a gesture he knows his mother detests, she does not scold him on his manners, though, too concerned about the crisscrossing wounds on the inside of his wrist. "A few days."

She continues to look at it for a few more seconds, a smile tugs at the corner of her mouth, and he frowns. It is an unexpected reaction from the woman who usually airlifts him to the emergency room if he so much as scrapes his knee. "What's so funny?"

A bluish black eyebrow, identical to his own, arches. "Isn't there a better way to ask that, Sasuke-kun?"

He corrects himself. "Why are you smiling, ka-san?"

Her smile widens. "Nothing, sweetheart". She pinches his cheek and stands. "Hurry up and wash, I'll be waiting with the first aid kit in the kitchen." She begins to leave and calls over her shoulder, "Don't take too long."

Confused, he does as told, nonetheless and is heading towards the kitchen twenty minutes later. His father and older brother are already at the breakfast bar. He calls out a greeting, Itachi smiles at him and returns the greeting, his father acknowledges him with a nod.

"Did you sleep well, little brother?"

Sasuke nods twice before hopping up to his own place. He glances at the kitchen clock, the two hands both rest at seven, which meant that he had twenty five minutes before his first period.

Mikoto leans next to him and takes his hand in hers, an open white box of bandages and band-aids beside her. The subtle scent of surgical betadine spreads through the air as she begins to dab at his broken skin with a wet cotton swab, he recoils when he feels a sharp sting, but her grip on him is firm, and she does not allow him to pull away. "Don't be a baby, Sasuke-kun. It will be over in a second."

He tries not to pout but fails miserably. He does not attempt to pull away again.

Fugaku sets the paper he is reading on the counter. "What happened to you?", Almost at the same time, Itachi says, "Did someone hurt you?"

He denies the accusation immediately, almost offended that his older brother thinks someone could do such a thing to him, that he would let them. "I did this to myself, it was itchy." His tone exudes annoyance, because he is annoyed, he doesn't like explaining something so silly, so many times, especially to Itachi, and his father, who already thinks him careless enough.

Instead of a warm, but condescending, smile from his brother, and a disapproving shake of the head form his father, the pair exchange looks instead, while his mother continues to bind his wrist with three times more bandages than he thinks necessary with that curious little smile still present on her face. His eyes travel between the three members of his family, irritated that there is a joke buried somewhere in the situation and he isn't in on it.

His mother finally releases him and starts to gather her supplies, he expects some sort of explanation from one of them, but nothing comes, his father carries on with his reading, his brother reaches for his spoon again, and his mother goes about preparing a plate for him.

"Have you made any new friends lately, Sasuke?"

The question comes from his father, which is odd, so odd, that for a second, young Sasuke does not even register the words. The question is odd, because one, it comes from his father, and his father rarely asks him about anything, let alone his friends and two, because the the chances of him making a new friends are extremely low, bordering on inexistent.

The Uchiha patriarch does not shift his attention from the newspaper, but the air around him is expectant, so, Sasuke swallows a mouthful of scrambled eggs with a sip of milk and replies, "No. I haven't." He adds because his parents are sticklers for grammar and proper speech.

Fugaku does not do anything but nod, the movement barely perceptible behind the paper he is holding wide open. Itachi stands and sets his dish in the sink, backpack firmly placed on his two shoulders, he ruffles Sasuke's hair on his way out.

"Perhaps you will soon, Sasuke."

Sasuke is just about to ask why every single member of his family is acting strangely today, when his mother places a hand on her hip. "Quickly, Sasuke, finish your breakfast, you have mathematics in ten minutes."

He climbs towards the third floor where the schoolroom is. Mr. Yakushi joins him exactly three hundred and seventy seconds later, and they start the lesson not two minutes after that.

Of course, his mother does not completely forget about his so called injury, she acts within character for the first time today, and informs him that they will head to the hospital for a checkup and antibiotics. he knows better than to argue, even as a needle is introduced into his arm for the umpteenth time for a blood sample, and not when another pierces his skin again for a shot of antibiotics, and not even when he watches his doctor prescribe three different pills. It is useless to point out that this is completely unnecessary, and that they are overreacting, he is, after all, seven years old, what does he know?

A nurse redresses his arm, and he waits with his mother for his blood test results.

A mop of pink to his right commands his attention, he turns, and discovers that the mop of pink is actually someone's hair, she is small, sitting two chairs away from him, beside a tall blonde woman. She takes notice that he is looking at her and smiles widely, there is a brief exchange of words between her and the woman beside her, whom he assumes is her mother, the blonde nods towards him, and the girl with strange hair scoots down the two seats to sit beside him.

Her eyes are even stranger, a bright, bright green he does not remember seeing on anyone else. Her presence goes unacknowledged, even after his mother nudges him not so subtly. She makes the first move.

"Are you here for your flu shot?"

Another nudge from his mother.

"No." Another nudge. "I am not."

"Oh." She returns. "I am here for mine, needles scare me."

He does not know any way to answer this, so he says nothing, even when he feels his mother's elbow gently jab him for the fourth time, his mother gives up seemingly, and they sit in silence until the nurse calls out his name. Hand in hand, he heads, with his mother, towards the lab reception.

For a reason he does not know, as they walk past the girl he says, "Needles aren't scary, they only hurt for a second."

That night he wakes up in pain, on the tail end of a scream, his right hand immediately wraps around his left wrist and he grips tightly, in a frantic effort to put an end to the agony. Within seconds, two doors slam open, footsteps echo loudly in contrast with the silence of the night, and he is no longer alone in his room.

He is not aware of much beyond the pain, but the deep scent of jasmine tells him that his mother is nearby, he feels her kneel beside him, and her arms pull him into an embrace, the bed dips on the other side, and he does not know if it is his brother or his father that joins them.

"Let me see, Sasuke-kun." The Uchiha matriarch attempts to pry his fingers off the bandaged area, and he does not let her.

"It hurts." He groans. "It hurts, ka-san."

His hair is brushed away from his forehead. "I know sweetheart, let me see, please."

His resistance cedes, and he tries to breathe deeply through the torture of her unwrapping the bandages, the cool air brushes his skin, and there is some relief in that.

"Look, Sasuke-kun, what do you see?"

He does as told and expects rivulets of blood, or some other grotesque sight, instead, what he sees stuns him into silence, the pain forgotten, almost as if it never existed.

Sasuke's brother prods gently. "What do you see, Sasuke, is there a name?"

He is even more stunned, because true enough, beneath the newly healed scratches, the thin, brown layer of betadine is a name in black, bold letters. A full name.

"Y-yes." He finally replies. "It's-"

His mother's index finger shushes his lips. "You don't have to say it, Sasuke-kun." Her own lips stretch into a smile. "Is the pain better now?"

He nods yes, because the pain is almost gone. "What is happening?" Because clearly, everyone save him knows what is the matter with him and the strange name that is now tattooed on the inside of his wrist.

"You've found your soulmate, Sasuke-kun."

* * *

Sasuke wakes up fifteen minutes to seven, still lying down, out of habit, he brushes his right thumb against the skin of his wrist, he raises his left hand into his line of vision and reads, for the millionth time, the black letters in sharp contrast with his pale skin, his thumb continues to rub but the two words remain there, permanent, he should know, this isn't his first attempt at erasing the name.

It isn't that he is opposed to having a soulmate, the idea that there was a person out there who belongs to him, and whom he belongs to in return, did not bother him, it is even comforting to an extent. It is the fact that he does not know this person that is an irritating thorn in his side.

His mother says that is bound to happen sooner or later, that it is only a matter of time before he finds the person with his name written on their own wrist.

He remembers that for the first time ever, his lesson will not take place in the schoolroom on the third floor, but at Konoha High school and he springs off the bed. He makes short work of getting ready, because the school is a fifteen minute's bus ride away, and he cannot afford to be late.

His mother greets him with a brilliant smile, and his father is nowhere to be found. He takes his seat at the breakfast bar and serves himself some cereal while the Uchiha matriarch busies herself with piling a plate with heaping amounts of food she insists he needs.

"It's a big day, today, Sasuke-kun? Nervous?"

He makes a big a show of chewing the cornflakes just to prolong the enjoyment of watching his mother fidget. She stands with her back to the counter, her hands working knots out of her apron. It is apparent that though she no longer verbally protests his wish to join highs school, as opposed to homeschooling, she is still opposed to the idea. "It's not too late to change your mind you know." She adds.

"No." He finally answers, dragging the one syllable out until he can see a twitch in her brow. "I am not nervous. Not even a little."

Her disappointment is so glaringly obvious, it is funny. "Alright then, are you sure you don't want me to drive you there? I could drop you off on my way to work, it will be no trouble."

He does not drag it out this time, it is cruel to tease her any further. She is not coping well with his decision to step into the outside world, so to speak. He isn't purposely trying to hurt her, it is just that he believes that eight years of homeschooling is enough time, he can no longer find it in himself to humor her, his sheltered life is not a lifestyle he can stand anymore, it grates on his nerves, to sit in his house all day long, to leave it only when strictly necessary, and then, only when accompanied. Since Itachi's departure to university, it is only been getting worse and worse, without his brother around, his mother denies him the simplest trip outside.

School offers him an opportunity to actually get a breath of fresh air five days a week. "No, thank you. The bus stop is not far away."

He dutifully places his bowl of cereals in the sink and puts the milk in the fridge. His mother's cheek is warm when he places his lips against it. "I'll be fine, ka-san, don't worry about me." In compromise he offers, "I'll call you at lunch break?"

She leans into his kiss, and her eyelids flutter over dark orbs identical to his own, her chest heaves with a surrendering sigh. "And when you get there, and when you head back." Her eyes open, and she hooks her hands over his shoulders, his taller than her now, barely, but her arms are forced to reach upwards nonetheless, and he can tell that it bothers her, that she can no longer curl around him in a cocoon of protection. "And if anything happens, Sasuke, _anything,_ you call me, and I'll come get you right away, promise?"

"Nothing will happen, ka-san, but yes, I will call you."

It is her lips that meet his cheek this time, and she lingers there, she pulls away and her lips stretch into a forced smile. "Have a great first day, sweetheart."

The trip to the bus stop is just as he thought, uneventful, the weather is uncharacteristically nice for an autumn day in Konoha, there is a gentle breeze teasing his hair back and forth instead of a strong wind that might as well push him of the sidewalk. Four empty seats greet him when he steps onto the bus, in spite of it being the first day of school, and he guesses that it is not a busy route from the Uchiha residence to Konoha high school, it isn't surprising, since they live in a secluded part of the town, almost on the outskirts of it, fresh, clean air and all that.

His pocket vibrates just as he settles himself at the very back of the bus, his brother's name appears on his cell phone screen.

"Hello?" He greets.

" _Hello, little brother. How is your first day going so far?"_

He smiles at nothing in particular, because his brother, busy as he is with his studies all the way in Ame, remembers that it is his first day and calls to check in. "I'm on my way, so technically, my first day hasn't started yet."

There is a soft chuckle on the other side. _"So mother let you out of the house after all? I was certain we would have a hostage situation on our hands."_

"She tried, believe me, but I," He pauses, searching for the right words, "I made up my mind, if it were up to her, I'd be covered in a layer of dust, I know it sounds ungrateful, and I know mom wants what's best for me, but-"

" _You don't have to justify, Sasuke, not to me. It is your life, and you're free to live it however you want."_ There is a pause. _"Within boundaries of course, you're fourteen, too young for girls, drugs and alcohol."_

"Does that mean I can do girls, drugs and alcohol when I'm older?"

A pause. _"Perhaps mother should reconsider the hostage situation after all, I think you have a lot of pent-up misbehavior, fourteen years is a lot to make up for, it could be dangerous."_

Sasuke rolls his eyes. "I'm going to hang up now, Ni-san, thanks for calling."

The playful banter is forgotten when his brother sighs. _"I wish I could have been there, little brother, I never wanted to go to Ame-"_

Sasuke does not allow him to finish, it is an old, old conversation that his family enjoys to recycle every once in a while, and it is exhausting to listen to it every single time. "You trying to build your lives around me does not make it easier for me, it only serves to hurt me, Ni-san, you're the best, you deserve the best, not to settle for a second grade institute because your little brother-"

" _Alright, alright."_ His brother interrupts. _"There is no need to get so worked up, I won't bring it up again."_ A blatant lie. _"Have a great day, Sasuke, I'll call you in the evening."_

"Alright, thanks. Bye."

The bus comes to a stop several minutes later and then again, in front of a building he does not recognize, which is not saying much since he is not familiar with most if the city, he steps off anyways, because he knows that KHS is the second stop.

It is everything he expects it to be, and at the same time, beyond his wildest imaginations. There is an embarrassing faint flutter in his lower belly, and he refuses to acknowledge it as excitement. It is the first day of school, new students all over the place, so people do not single him out as the kid that never set foot inside a school before, and he refuses to acknowledge that as comforting as well. A sensation that dates to seven years ago returns, and he finds himself absentmindedly rubbing the area linking his arm to his hand, he frowns, there is a subtle burning constricting his wrist, it is nothing like the agony of that night, but it is there, and it bothers him. He tries not to pay it too much mind and calls his mother like he promised.

His schedule, a paper handed to him by his mother, who received it from the administration, indicates that his first class is to be biology, he follows the signs into the appropriate building and classroom, he finds a seat in spite of it being empty of anyone but him.

People begin to filter in when the bell rings, in groups, talking loudly, laughing, no one pays him any heed, which is more than fine with him, they take random seats until the classroom is full, save but the one next to him.

Their teacher joins them fifteen times later than when the class is set to start, he is an odd silver headed, albeit young, man with a surgical mask covering the bottom half of his face.

"I'm sorry I'm late kids, I was-" He is interrupted when the door is brusquely thrown open. All eyes settle on a pink haired girl bent at the waist, chest rising and falling rapidly. She straightens abruptly, and then bows again to apologize profusely. The scene is so comical that Sasuke cannot resist the tug at the corner of his lips, as other kids openly laugh.

"I am so sorry, sensei." She manages to get out between frantic gulps of air. "I did not mean to be late on my first day, I am so sorry."

Their teacher tilts his head, almost at loss for words. "I suppose that is alright, since it means that I'm actually early for once, take a seat."

Her eyes widen, as is she cannot believe that she is not being sent to the principal's office. She walks towards him nonetheless, and settles her things beside him. Something about her is oddly familiar, which is ridiculous since pink hair is nothing something you come by every day. He brushes the odd feeling off, and stares ahead.

"Well, hello, class. I suppose I should welcome you to high school, these will be the best and worst years of your lives, yada, yada, yada. My name is Hatake Kakashi, you may call me Kakashi-sensei, I'll be your biology teacher as well as your football coach." He writes his name on the board, as well as their subject for the day. "Take a good look at the person beside you, they will be your partner for the rest of the school year for lab work, projects, papers, everything."

He turns to the girl beside him at the same time she does. Red covers the majority of her face, her odd hair is in disarray, and her shoulders continue to rise and fall very noticeably. She smiles and extends her hand. He hesitates for a second, for reasons he does not know, before shaking her hand.

She tilts her head. "This is going to sound cheesy, but do I know you from somewhere?"

He opens his mouth to reply but the teacher interrupts.

"Alright people, enough introductions, let's talk mitosis."

They don't talk for the rest of the period, concentrated on cellular division and DNA replication. The bell rings before he knows it, and he begins to gather his things, the girl, Sakura, does the same, and so does everyone else. They start to leave the classroom.

At the door, the teacher, calls out to him. "Uchiha, right?"

Sasuke raised an eyebrow. "Sasuke Uchiha, sir." He corrects, because he does appreciate being referred to with his prestigious last name, as if he is nothing more than the name. "Can I help you?"

The silver haired man shakes his head. "You are the spitting image of your mother, I wanted to make sure."

Sasuke cannot help the surprise from appearing on his face. "You know my mother?"

"We went to the same university, I was a freshman, Mikoto was a senior, she helped me pass psychology."

Sasuke's arms cross over his chest. "My mother is an architect."

His teacher laughs. "True, but she knows her psychology."

Sasuke wants to ask exactly how his mother, a senior, who had absolutely nothing to do with psychology, could come to know that Kakashi, a freshman, struggled with it, and help him pass, and then he decides that he most definitely does not want to know, and turns to leave.

At the door, he stops. "She asked you to watch out for me, didn't she?"

He doesn't need to turn back to know that Kakashi is smiling when he says. "Good day, Sasuke."

Incorrigible woman.

* * *

The following classes are thankfully do not involve meddlesome mothers and their long lost college friends, by the time lunch break rolls by he finds himself surprisingly hungry, starving actually. He calls his mom as promised and does not mention the thing with his biology teacher, he figures it, along with a conversation about boundaries, could wait until he gets home.

The cafeteria does not offer very appetizing food, nothing like the meals his mother prepares for him at home, but it is a small price to pay, he opts for an underwhelming slice of pizza, because it's the only thing that has tomato on it, and an apple, not exactly a meal his mother would approve of, he thinks he might as well bring his own lunch from now on.

"Hey!" He hears from a place behind him, he almost does not turn around, because he is not sure the call is for him, but does when he hears it again. His dark grey eyes meet green.

"Hi, want to have lunch with us?"

The pink haired girl asks, a smiling blond beside her. "Our friends are sitting at a table right there." She points at a relatively less crowded part of the cafeteria.

His first thought is to say no, but he remembers that his mother, albeit reluctant to let him join high school, hopes to see him actually interact with people and make new acquaintances if not friends, as opposed of going from a solitary existence at home, to a solitary existence here.

"Yeah." He hears himself saying. "Thanks."

The table their lead him to has two people already sitting at it, two guys one named Shikamaru, the other, Sai. The blonde girl is Ino.

"I never introduced myself, sorry." The pink girl says. "I'm Sakura."

He pauses, his pizza midway to his lips. "Sakura?" He repeats.

She nods, her smile unwavering. "Yeah, Sakura, Haruno Sakura."

A couple of heartbeats pass by, and he continues to stare at her, before he realizes how crazy he looks. "Sasuke." He counters. "Uchiha Sasuke, sorry."

There is no reaction from her beyond a small shake of her head. "Don't worry about it, you're not the only one to find it weird."

"It's not weird." Not uncommon, but not very common either. "It's…fitting."

He goes home to an empty house, which is not odd given that his father does not finish work until dinnertime, and his mother at around five. He does what little homework he has to do, given that it is only the first day of school, then lies on his bed, and stares at his ceiling for the better part of an hour, and kneads his left wrist which begins to ache with a vengeance, until sleep overcomes him.

He wakes up to soft knocking on his door, he is slow to respond, and the knocking comes louder, he sits up and glances at the clock, forty five minutes past five. "Come in."

The door reveals his mother, still dressed in her business suit. "Sasuke-kun, were you sleeping?"

He nods. "Did you just get home?"

"Yes. I went grocery shopping. Are you okay? You're not sick, are you?"

He almost rolls his eyes but recovers in time. "No, mom, I am fine, just tired."

She shakes her head. "I should have taken you, I told you to let me drive you, tomorrow, I'm taking you, no protests."

"Mom-"

"No, I concede some, you concede some, that's compromise, Sasuke-kun."

"Does compromise include talking to my teachers about things I don't want you to talk to them about? Like babysitting me for example?"

Red immediately overcomes her pale complexion. "I did no such thing, I don't know what you're talking about."

His eyes narrow, just as hers widen in mock innocence. "Lying is a sin, mom."

She takes hold of his cheek and pinches gently. "So is disrespecting your parents, young man, Kakashi is a friend, and I…talked to him to, uh, put my mind at ease, there is absolutely no shame in that."

"Sure thing, ka-san, I wonder how tou-san would feel about you talking to your college boyfriend about me, I-"

A pillow collides with his face a second before he hears his name exclaimed in outrage.

"You have no respect, whatsoever." His mother's face is the same color as his favorite fruit. "And I should ground you!" She stands and swats violently imaginary dust grains off her skirt. She starts to leave and then turns towards him abruptly. "And for the record, Kakashi was _not_ my boyfriend."

His laughter follows her out of the room.

From the hallway he hears, "And do your homework!"

He finds immense satisfaction in yelling back, "Already did."

He heads to his bathroom and sprays cool water on his face. He winces when the water touches the bold black letters inked on his skin. It occurs to him that he does not as much attention to the issue as he probably should. The letters are there, he knows what they mean, or at the very least, what they should mean, but he does not care overly much. It will happen when it is supposed to happen.

At least, he does not pay much attention to it until the next day when he, once again, shares the table with Sakura and her friends. It is odd to think of her that way, they are not his friends, but neither is Sakura, so the proper way to think of them would be 'classmates' in general, instead of Sakura and her friends, as if Sakura is in a different category than the rest.

His eyes happen to fall on her wrist and he takes notice of her skin there. He finds himself asking, "Sakura, is your wrist bothering you?"

Her eyes, bright, bright green eyes, widen, and her eyes follow his line vision, she raises the appendage for closer inspection and frowns. "No, not at all. Why do you ask?"

He shakes his head and digs into his sandwich. "Nothing, it seemed a bit red to me, that's all."

Her shoulder lift and drop in a shrug and she continues her conversation with Ino.

* * *

At the dinner table his mother asks, "Sasuke-kun, are you alright? You've been quiet all evening?"

Which is an odd question, given the fact that he is not exactly a chatterbox. "I'm fine."

She persists. "Are you sure? You don't like the chicken?"

He shakes his head and takes a forkful of the roast for emphasis. "No, it's great."

His father chooses to join the conversation then. "Is everything alright at school? How are your classes?"

Sasuke almost sighs but catches himself just in time, his father joining the conversation means that it will continue further than he wants it to, he digs around his brain for something to satisfy them.

"A classmate asked me to try out for the football team."

When his mother's fork clatters against her plates, he knows that he hit jackpot. "I said I didn't want to."

The Uchiha patriarch clears his throat; his hand subtly covers Mikoto's on the table, whose other hand tightens until her knuckles turn white. "Sasuke," His father begins, "I know-"

"I know." He quickly interrupts, and he feels guilty for playing their emotions this way, it is necessary though, to avoid conversations he does not want to have. "I know I can't. Thank you for dinner, mom, may I be excused?"

They become friends, he and Sakura, and by extension the rest of her group become friends of his as well. She calls him at odd hours of the day, to share funny stories she heard from Ino, to go over details from their assignments. They sit in the library for hours, they study together, eat together, and share most of their classes together. He doesn't know exactly when it happens; he only knows that somewhere, somehow, along the way, they become best friends.

* * *

The first time he takes Sakura home is during their sophomore year, to work on a project, this time, they are partners out of their own volition and not because the seat next to him is the last empty one.

She walks shyly up the stairs, behind him, he leads her into his room, because that's where his computer is, and tells her to make herself at home. She is the first person outside his family to ever set foot in his house, let alone his room.

She is stiff when she sits on his chair, her arms holding her bag firmly to her chest, so he takes the bag from her and sets it on the desk. "Relax." He orders. "Get your stuff out, I'll be right back, I'll get us some food."

She nods reluctantly, reaches for her bag and pulls out her notepad and pencil case at the same time he reaches forward to turn the computer on. Her hair tickles the exposed skin of his upper arm and he ignores the slight burn that is his constant companion.

She smiles. "I'll look some stuff up while you're gone?"

The front door opens just as he plates the four sandwiches he put together, his mother steps into the kitchen to find him placing the plate on a tray along with two apples and a knife.

"Sasuke?" She questions and inspects the contents of the tray. "Are you going to eat all those?"

It occurs to him that he should have asked his mother for permission before asking Sakura over, this is unknown territory for him this is his first time bringing a friend home. "It's not just for me, there's someone in my room."

Her eyebrows nearly disappear into her hairline. "Someone? In your room?"

He shifts uncomfortably, as if the tray is too much weight, eve, though it barely amounts to a kilogram. "Yeah, my partner for a school project. Her name's Sakura." He adds as an afterthought.

"A girl?"

He scowls at her disbelief. "Yes, mom, a girl, and if you don't mind, we have a project to do."

Her hip supports her against the counter, and her arms cross over her chest, pulling the light fabric of her blouse taught. "I don't know, Sasuke-kun, is Sakura the reason your phone bill skyrocketed over the past year? And why have I never met her before?"

"You can meet her now, ka-san."

His mother's rose painted lips stretch over pearly white teeth. "Leave the tray, I'll bring it up."

Sakura is hunched over the computer, her notepad has a page's worth of information on it already. She smiles in greeting and scoots over so he can pull a bench next to her. "What took you so long, Sasuke-kun? You're not slacking up on me, are you?"

He rolls his eyes and reaches for a paper and pen of his own. "Shut up and work."

They both turn towards the door not five minutes later when someone clears their throat, his mother is standing in the doorway, holding a tray twice the size of the one he had prepared, laden with a plate of biscuits, a bowl of chips, a steaming kettle of what he assumes is tea, in addition to what the sandwiches and apples.

Sakura stands so fast she nearly knocks her chair over, her hands join in front of her and she bends low. "Hello, Uchiha-san, I apologize for not greeting you earlier, thank you for having me." Although he mostly has his back to her, Sasuke can feel her green eyes burning holes into the back of his skull.

The tray goes on the desk between them and his mother smiles broadly. "That's alright, sweetheart, I just got here, and you're always welcome here, you must be Sakura."

It is his turn to glare flying daggers at his mother because he knows she purposely makes it seem as if Sakura is all he talks about in spite of, up until a few minutes ago, not even knowing her name. She smiles back at him innocently.

"Yes, Mrs. Uchiha, Sasuke and I are working on a paper for our social studies class." She tucks a rose lock of her hair behind her ear, a habit Sasuke recognizes as a nervous gesture. He wants to cover her hand with his own and squeeze in assurance, but he does not do that, because that would give his mother ammunition for weeks, he'd never hear the end of it. "Our school library is closed for repairs, so Sasuke suggested we do it here-"

"Sakura." He finally interrupts, because if left up to her, Sakura could go on for days. "I think we should get back to work, now?"

"Of course, of course." It is his mother that replies. "Sit down, dear. I'll leave you guys to it." She starts to leave. "And Sakura, if your parents don't mind, we'd love to have you for dinner."

He begins to worry for Sakura's health when her face burns even redder than it already is. "Um, thank you so much for the invitation, but I wouldn't want to be a bother."

"None sense, we'd love to have you."

Sakura is uncomfortable, she wants to turn down the invitation, that much is obvious, and it is understandable, she doesn't want to walk into unknown territory, unprepared, she is the type to want to bring a gift, a pie or something, make plans, put together a few witty remarks arranged around polite conversation, she does not know how to say no, though, so he does it for her.

"Some other time, mother." There is a silent communication between him and his mother, and the Uchiha matriarch relents.

"I will hold you to that, Sakura-chan, work hard, now." At the door she adds, "Leave this open, alright children?"

The second his mother is no longer in sight, her footsteps echoing softly down the stairs, Sakura's tiny, but very much effectual, fist collides with his upper arm, she regains her seat, then punches him again, this time his shoulder, when it looks like she's aiming for his shin, he scoots away.

"Crazy much?"

"You could have told me your mother was here, Sasuke-kun! You said your parents weren't home."

"They weren't." He countered. "Mom just got here, she must have gotten off early. What's the big deal?"

She slouches in her chair, comfortable now that they are alone and that she has successfully turned his skin black and blue. "You're supposed to ask your parents about these things, don't you know this?"

He merely shrugs. "I wouldn't know, never had anyone over before." He is not embarrassed about this, or self-conscious, though he knows that it is odd for someone his age not to have at least one friend visit him.

Her eyes study his ceiling and he knows that she is thinking. "Sasuke-kun?"

"Hm?" He replies as he shifts his attention back to where it belongs, the assignment that is due tomorrow.

"You never told me which middle school you went to, I mean you never mention your other friends."

He takes a minute to ponder her question, and realizes that yes, it is not something he shared with her, not a conscious decision on his part, it is simply not a subject they ever talk about. Their friendship is pretty straightforward, she talks, he listens with an impeccably concealed rapture, taking in every detail about her, every childhood anecdote, and every aspect of her personality.

"Up until freshman year, I was homeschooled, homeschooling doesn't exactly lend itself to making new friends."

"Homeschooled, why?"

"My mother is a bit too protective for her own good."

The answer comes easily.

He clicks on a random link on the computer link. "So, recession?"

Sakura wants to ask more questions, and it is obviously killing her not to do so, but the nerd in her cannot resist the pull of homework, so she starts to read a particularly interesting paragraph she found during his short trip to the kitchen.

When he tells his mother that he is walking Sakura to the bus station, she begins to protest, exactly as he thought, she opens her mouth, then closes her eyes, glancing briefly at Sakura. "Are you sure you don't want me to drive you home, Sakura? I'll be more than happy to."

"No, thank you, Mrs. Uchiha, I really don't want to trouble you, my house is very close to my stop."

His mother's teeth sink into her bottom lip, and although it is obvious that she wants to protest some more, but a look from Sasuke changes her mind. "Oh alright then, be careful now. Take your jacket, Sasuke-kun, it's cold outside. I mean it."

It is an easy enough thing to do so he grabs a jacket and waits for Sakura to put on her shoes. It isn't exactly cold outside, but he isn't overly warm either.

Sakura laughs suddenly and he raises an eyebrow in question. "Your mother," She starts, "Is really overprotective, isn't she? I mean, she really doesn't want you to catch a cold."

He shoves his hand into his pockets and looks ahead. "You caught that, didn't you?"

She laughs more. "Kind of hard to miss, isn't it? It's nice, I guess. I'm an only child, a girl nonetheless, as you know, so my parents always had a 'tough it out' attitude."

"Did I tell you that I have an older brother?"

She stops dead in her tracks. "What?"

His lips curve upwards. "Yeah, Itachi, he's in college in Ame, so that's why he never came up I guess."

They resume walking, and out of his peripheral vision, he can see Sakura studying him closely. "I really don't know much about you, do I, Sasuke-kun?"

He shrugs. "I guess you don't." His answer does not deter her, instead, she links her arm through his and pulls him closer to her, he stumbles for a heartbeat, then adjusts his stride to accommodate her body pressed against his.

"That's alright." She chirps. "Still have at least two years to know all there is to know about you, Uchiha." Her head tilts to the side. "For example, what was it like? Being homeschooled? Was it fun?"

Sakura thinks back on his waking at the exact same hour, every single day, sitting at the same chair, looking at the same board, and more often than not, receiving his lessons from the same person, all day, every day. "It's not exactly what I would call fun, but it was alright." It isn't like he knew any different.

"Tell me more."

She seems genuinely interesting, so he begins to tell her. "I had one teacher from grades one to six, Kabuto, Mr. Yakushi, I didn't like him much, and then another for seventh and eighth grade, Orochimaru, liked him even less, but they did their job well, tou-san wouldn't have settled for anything less."

"Were they mean?" Sakura asks this in a tone interlaced with anger and a subtle inclination for violence, as if she was prepared to march to wherever his teachers were, and hurt them, badly, were he to say yes.

"No." He answers. "Not at all, I guess they were too nice, I don't know, they just didn't sit well with me."

"I suppose that's why you sometimes sound older than you actually are, you've only ever been around older people, not us, lesser mortals."

They come to stop just as the bus pulls in, Sakura pulls away from him."That's me, I guess, thanks for walking me, Sasuke-kun, see you tomorrow?"

He nods. "Text when you get home."

She smiles and steps in. "Sure thing."

His mother isn't pacing their driveway as he expected to find her, instead, she is in the kitchen, putting the last finishes on what is, no doubt, a delicious meal. He kisses her cheek in greeting, and she responds with a smile. "Did Sakura make it home okay?"

"Yeah. She just texted me." He opens one of the cabinets and starts to set the tables, he reaches for concave plates, but sets them down, and reaches for flat ones instead, when he picks up on the smell of his mother's signature spaghetti sauce.

"She seems like a great girl, very polite. Somewhat familiar."

"She is." He calls back from the dining room.

"Have you been friends long?" She joins him in the dining room with a steaming platter of spaghetti. "Your father should be down soon."

"We met first day of school, we were lab partners."

They both head back to the kitchen for glasses and silverware. "First day, this year?"

"No, last year."

She stops, and rests her weight on one leg, with a hand on her hip. "Oh? You've never mentioned her before."

He doesn't look up from the table he's setting. "I didn't have reason to."

"Oh. Well, invite her for dinner sometime, okay? She's your first friend, I'd like to properly meet her, and I'm sure your father would like it too."

"Meet who?"

Fugaku Uchiha joins them in the dining room and takes his place at the head of the table. His gaze shifts between the two of them, waiting for an answer. His mother takes her place as well, and does not bat an eyelash when she says, "Sasuke-kun's girlfriend."

Sasuke freezes, half-crouched, halfway through lowering himself on his chair. "Mom?"

"Yes, sweetie?"

"Let us make one thing clear, Sakura is _not_ my girlfriend, alright?"

"Whatever you say, Sasuke-kun."

"You're hopeless."

* * *

They're in the library, one day, going over their chemistry notes together, because they have a test the following day, and though he never admits it out loud, Sakura's notes are always better than his.

"Hey, wanna go out tomorrow with the guys? We could catch a movie?" She asks, after they finish calculating the mass of sulfuric acid on an problem they did a while back. "There's this really good thriller in theaters."

He blinks at her. "I have a thing to do."

She narrows her eyes. "What thing?"

"A thing."

A breath of annoyance escapes her lips and she begins to calculate the half life of the reaction. "Come out and say you're scared, Sasuke-kun, there's no shame in that."

"Come out and say you're scared to watch it on your own, Sakura, there's no shame in that." He counters.

"Whatever, Sasuke-kun, you never go out, don't you ever get bored?"

He taps his pencil against his copybook, on a whim he says, "I'll tell you what, if you come to dinner so my mother can finally get off my back about inviting you over, then I'll come watch the stupid movie."

She drops her pencil. "For real? Are you for real?"

He nods, inwardly preparing himself for the arguments he is bound to have with his mother. "Yeah, what do you say?"

Her lips stretch into a smile so wide, a dimple he does not remember ever seeing dents her left cheek. "Next weekend okay for you?"

"Aright, dinner my place next weekend, movie tomorrow."

The soft skin of her lips is not something he ever expected to feel pressed against his cheek, but sure enough, out of the corner of his eye, all he sees is pink, all he smells is strawberry, and all he feels is Sakura. It is over before it even began, pink dusts her cheeks, but her smile never leaves her face.

"Thanks, Sasuke-kun."

True to her nature, Uchiha Mikoto refuses to listen to anything about him going anywhere. "No." She exclaims. "No, no, Sasuke, absolutely not, you want to go see a horror movie, no!"

They are in the living room, he is sitting on the sofa opposite his parents, at least, opposite his father, his mother jumped from her seat the second he mentioned going out.

"I can't allow this, Sasuke-kun, I'm sorry. Fugaku say something."

Sasuke opens his mouth before his father can. "I promised Sakura I would go, Sakura." He speaks calmly

"Well, you shouldn't have." She counters. She takes a second to breathe in, eyes closed, to calm down. "You can watch a movie here, Sasuke-kun, certainly not horror!"

"A horror movie is not going to kill me, mother. I'll be fine, you're overreacting." A burst of anger he does not understand takes over his senses, and he has to employ considerable effort, to maintain a respectful manner of speech. "I've never said no to you, ka-san, I have never done anything you did not want me to do, don't make me start now, please!"

Her eyes widen but she does not relent. "I've never forbidden you from doing anything, Sasuke, _you_ don't make me start."

"Mikoto." His father finally intervenes, he looks at Sasuke when he speaks. "You can go, Sasuke."

"Oh, no, he cannot, I-"

"Mikoto." His father repeats. "Not this time, he can go, what time does the movie start?"

"Five thirty." There is a knot in his throat, and he tries to swallow it down, this is his first time going against his mother, the first time his father has to come to his defense, it is usually the other way around, and it is hard.

"Alright, then, you can go, you have to be back at eight, eight thirty at the latest."

He can almost hear his mother grind her teeth, her jaw is held taught, lean muscles protruding, she is so tense, she visibly trembles. He has never seen his mother so angry, so _hurt._ When he opens his mouth to speak, she holds up her hand. "I will drive you to and back from the theater, Sakura can either meet you here, or we can pick her up, I _will not_ settle for anything less, if I call you, at any given moment and you don't answer your phone you, you bet your ass I'm calling the police, the firefighters, and maybe even the army, understood?"

He simply swallows the saliva that gathered in his mouth in response to the adrenaline that rushes through his system the second he hear his mother use a word, so casually, like 'ass'. He nods, and when she turns on her heels to head up the stairs, and his legs launch him after her. Like a child, he latches on to her sleeve.

"Ka-san," He starts, small and humble, "I don't want you to be this angry, don't be angry at me, please." His fingers tighten around her arm. "I know you want what is best for me, and you want to protect me, but a life lived like _this,_ " They are words he has wanted to say all his life, but somehow never made it past his thoughts, "Is not a life worth living."

There is no response, the Uchiha matriarch simply pulls away from him, and continues up the stairs.

* * *

His mother accompanies him to the front porch of Sakura's house, she stands beside him while he knocks on the door. Sakura's house is your typical middle-class home, small front yard, white fence, white walls, and a brick roof, a man he assumes to be Sakura's father, -his hair is a shade lighter, and greyer than Sakura's hair-, opens the door, he smiles broadly at the two of them, greets Mikoto as if they are old friends, instead of people who just met, within minutes, he is cracking poor dad jokes, and laughing at his own nonexistent sense of humor, until his wife, a tall blonde, chides him for not inviting them inside.

It turns out that there is no need for that, since Sakura joins them a second later, she blushes when she catches up with the punch line of another distasteful joke.

"There is Sakura, now." Haruno Mebuki exclaims. "You'll be off, now." She nudges her husband subtly to make him shut up. "Thank you so much for taking them, Mikoto-san."

"It is my pleasure, Mebuki-san, Sakura, dear, don't you look lovely."

It is his turn to nudge his mother, because while Sakura is of course lovely, there is nothing particularly different about her today, she's dressed in boyfriend jeans, ripped at the knees, a white printed black tank that seems a bit too short for her torso, and black sneakers.

She tucks a lock of her hair behind her hair and bows quickly. "Thank you, Mrs. Uchiha, and thank you for coming all the way here."

She slings a beige bag over her shoulder and waves at her parents.

"It was lovely meeting you, Mikoto-san, Sasuke-kun, come back to visit soon."

They all pretend not to notice when she holds her husband's hand in a vice like grip so he doesn't say anything embarrassing, the man simply waves at them, making a poor attempt to smile through the pain.

He chooses to sit next to Sakura, on the backseat, as opposed to riding shotgun, because he can feel that she feels very self-conscious and awkward, she fiddles idly with the strap of her bag, and smiles at him when he catches her eye.

"Did you do well on your test this morning, Sakura?"

"I think so, Mrs. Uchiha, it wasn't very hard, and Sasuke-kun and I studied well for it the day before."

"I'm glad."

That is the only attempt at small talk that his mother makes, and the rest of the ride is silent; they make it to their destination before they know it, anyways. They step out of the car, and both wave at the Uchiha mother. In dark grey eyes, he sees hesitation; pale hands tighten around the steering wheel.

"Have fun you two, I'll be back at around eight, okay?"

"We'll be alright, mom, thanks."

"Remember what we talked about Sasuke-kun, alright?"

"I will."

They watch her reverse out of the parking lot, before they go inside to get their tickets. "Is your mom alright, Sasuke-kun?"

He nods absentmindedly. "Yeah, why do you ask?" They stand in line at the ticket booth and he reaches into his pocket for his wallet, he sees Sakura do the same, but does not stop her.

"I don't know, she seemed kind of sad to me, I'm sorry, I know it's none of my business or anything, but," She shakes her head. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked."

He shrugs. "We sort of got into an argument, yesterday." He tilts his head, and then corrects himself. "Well, not an argument, more of a disagreement, really. Two tickets, please."

"Sasuke-kun!" Sakura exclaims when he pays for both tickets. "No fair, I invited you."

He gives her a look. "Whatever."

She smacks his shoulder. "Don't 'whatever' me, snacks are on me, agreed?"

No, he does not agree, but he remains silent just to humor her.

"So, you argued with your mother, and she still let you come out?"

A sigh escapes his lips, and his shoulders heave, because Sakura is like a dog with a bone, he merely gives her a look, and she frowns.

"Oh, so the argument was about you going out."

"Where were we supposed to meet the others again?" He asks before she has the chance to ask a question he does not want to answer. "It's five fifteen."

She glances at her watch. "Oh, you're right, they should have been here already, let me text Ino to find out." She reaches for her phone and types at the screen, a few seconds later, the device vibrates with a reply. Sakura's eyes barely land on the screen before she's groaning.

"Oh, come ooon."

Sasuke raises an eyebrow in question, and is even more confused when Sakura blushes. "What's the matter?"

"They're not coming, Ino says she came down with something, Shikamaru's girlfriend is in town, and I don't know what the hell is wrong with Sai but he's not coming either."

"Well, I guess that's that, why so pissed?"

Sakura stares at him in disbelief, and then shakes her head. "Of course, you've been sheltered most of your life, you don't how these things works." She shoves her phone into her pocket a bit too roughly, and mutters to herself. "Came down with something, my ass." To him, she adds, "They did this on purpose! Ino put them to it, I'm certain."

He remains confused. "Care to explain?"

"Ino told them not to come, so she can orchestrate a 'date', it's classic Ino, and the oldest trick in the book, I just can't believe I fell for it."

His face is expressionless. "What?"

"I know, right? As if, let's just get in, we'll miss the opening."

The movie is tolerable, to a point, it isn't terrifying, it isn't good, it isn't bad, it is just there, Sakura watches the screen, enraptured, flinching every once in a while, nearly jumping out of her chair every time something jumps from the shadows, she watches the screen, and he watches her. His so called tattoo hasn't bothered him in a while, more like he got used to the somewhat constant ache, today, it comes back with a vengeance. He does not try to rub it, as he has discovered that that does little to make the burning disappear, if anything, reminds him of its presence.

A particularly well done scream draws his attention to the screen a heartbeat before Sakura's hand closes around his arm, she holds it tightly, afraid to let go, her palm is damp with sweat, and very warm, but it cools the warmth of his own skin, so he holds on to the armrest as if his life depended on it.

The movie ends to an approving aura from the audience, Sakura stands and stretches her arms above her head, her top rides up, exposing a band of creamy skin, he almost reaches up to tug the shirt down, but catches himself at the last minute.

"You were right." They start walking up the theater. "If it hadn't been for you, I'd have walked after the first ten minutes."

He smirks. "Scaredy cat."

"Oh, come on. You have to admit you were a little scared." When he shakes his head, she pinches her thumb and index finger together. "Just a little bit? Not even a little?"

When he shakes his head again, she pouts. "Then you weren't watching."

True, but he is not about to tell her that. "There are scarier things in life, Sakura, than horror movies, you know, things that actually exist, everyday things, not ghosts and demons."

"You're sixteen, Sasuke. Be sixteen, jeez, you sound like you're sixty, or something." Her eyelids narrow over her green orbs. "Are you? Are you some immortal being trapped in the body of a sixteen year old?"

He walks past her, purposely shoving her shoulder with his. "You never know, Haruno, you never know."

Outside, they find his mother already waiting, she waves them over. He expects her to be a little less sad, a bit more her usual self now that she saw that he went to see a movie and the sky did not collapse on the earth, but she is even more subdued, her smile weak, like she barely put any effort into it.

In the rear view mirror, she studies them. "Sasuke-kun, I'll be happy to drop off your other friends, where are they?"

"They never showed, it's just Sakura."

He sees the first hint of a real, teasing, smile worthy of Mikoto Uchiha, and he can't find it in himself to be apprehensive about the teasing that will surely follow. "Alright, then, just Sakura, did you guys enjoy the movie?"

"It was okay." He says.

"It was great." Sakura counters. "Sasuke-kun's just too scared to admit it."

For a moment, he is speechless, shy, awkward Sakura who couldn't seem to say anything more than 'yes, ma'am' around his mother, is no more, the latter is just as surprised , at Sakura's newfound attitude, only for a moment, though, and then she starts to laugh.

"Of course, he is, sweetheart, of course, he is."

He walks Sakura up to her porch because his mother tells him to, it's May, so the air is comfortably warm, Sakura rubs her exposed arms nonetheless. "I had a great time, Sasuke-kun, we should do this more often."

He does not promise anything, because he knows that his mother is not likely to agree to anything anytime soon, with or without her husband's intervention. He merely nods. "Maybe, you should go inside, you're cold."

There is an odd light in her eyes, a mischievous glint that he barely has any time to study or interpret, because before he knows it, Sakura's lips are touching his cheek. "See you, Monday, Sasuke-kun."

And she disappears into her house.

He returns to the car and opens the passenger door, before he's even got his seatbelt on, he warns. "Don't."

A sound very similar to a snort a person makes when they are trying to hold in laughter escapes his mother. "I didn't say anything."

"You were going to."

"I was."

The comfortable May air somehow turns stifling.

It takes a few kilometers before he feels cool enough to open his mouth. "It was nothing, by the way."

"Whatever you say."

"And the fact that the others didn't come is their doing, not ours."

"Of course."

 _As if._ He remembers.

"Shut up." It is the most disrespectful thing he has ever said to his mother and she bursts into laughter.

He scoffs. "At least, you're laughing."

His mother's eyes drift towards him for a second before she focuses back on the road, she is still smiling when she says, "I always laugh."

"Not today." He counters. "And not yesterday, I went to the movie's and I came back, in one piece, no disasters, see?"

"Yesterday," She starts, "I was upset, heartbroken, because what you said, it sounded like you've given up."

He doesn't even hesitate. "On the contrary, ka-san, on the contrary."

* * *

He does not pick Sakura up for dinner, instead, they head there straight from school. They get on the bus to find that the only empty seats are a three chairs away from each other. An older lady occupying the seat next to one of the empty ones stands. "Here, you can sit next to each other." She smiles at them as she heads towards the back of the bus. "Such a cute couple."

They tell her thanks and claim the seats. "This is becoming a common occurrence."

He arches an eyebrow in question. "What?"

She gestures between them. "Us. People thinking we're dating, last week with Ino, can you believe mom told me to let my hair down this morning, because she was sure you'd appreciate it. And now this. Can you believe it?"

Sasuke studies said hair, gathered in a high ponytail, only a few wisps left to their own devices, and thinks to himself that yes, he would appreciate it. Thankfully, that is not what comes out of his mouth, instead, he bats his eyes mockingly. "What? Am I too ugly for you or something?"

 _As if._ She has said.

Sakura throws her head back and laughs. "No, Mr. Sarcasm, quite the opposite really, I mean clearly, they should see that you are way out of my league, we would make an awful couple, no balance and all that." She smiles. "We make good friends, but not a couple, I'm afraid."

"I'm heartbroken." Sarcasm, does after all, make for excellent cover.

She whips her ponytail to the other side. "I'm sure you'll get over it, difficult of course, but not impossible."

When they reach the stop, Sakura stands too soon, and lurches forward. Sasuke reaches for her, and her weight nearly pulls the both of them down, he manages to steady them at the last second, with one arm around Sakura's shoulder, and the other braced against the metal pole. The bus stops and the driver tells them to be more careful, when they step off, Sakura laughs. "Clumsy old me, thanks, by the way, great catch."

He digs his thumb into the skin covering the join between his hand and arm. Sakura frowns. "You always do that." She whispers, taking his hand into hers and taking over the process of trying to soothe the burn. "Does it bother you a lot?"

He pulls his hand back because it suddenly burns like someone's holding a lighter to it. "I don't know, habit I guess."

She starts to say something but her eyes widen when they land on his other forearm, she takes the limb in her hands again, and twists it almost uncomfortably. "You're hurt."

He contorts himself to get a better vision of the back of his arm, which Sakura does not let go of, the pale skin is married with a long streak of inflamed skin, and several droplets of blood. He inwardly groans at another trip to the hospital. "Must have scratched myself against the bus pole, it's nothing."

Sakura worries he bottom lips with her teeth. "Sorry."

"It's nothing." He insists. "Just a scratch."

She starts to reach into her backpack. "Hang on, I'll give you some tissue." His hand fists around hers.

"It's fine, I'll take care of it at home, don't worry about it."

He tugs her forward, and somehow forgets to let go the whole twenty minutes it takes them to get his house, and Sakura does not process. Uchiha Mikoto greets them at the door, clad in a dark purple dress and a tan apron, the whole house smells like culinary delights, and baked goods, and Sasuke knows that his mother has went above and beyond for their one guest.

Hellos and common courtesies are exchanged, while Sasuke feels as if his standing barefoot, on shards of glass lit on fire, he wants to go upstairs and bandage his arm before coming down, preferably dressed in something that would cover the bandages, before his mother takes notice.

When Sakura insists to help out and his mother finally agrees, he excuses himself. "I'll be right back." He says to Sakura, and starts to turn around, thinking that he's made it.

"Sasuke-kun!" The Uchiha matriarch exclaims. She walks towards him. "What happened to your arm? Why didn't you say anything?"

"Just a scratch, mom. I was going to take care of it."

Her hands start to work the knot behind her neck. "I'll get the kit, and-"

"Mom." He grits, his eyes drift to Sakura. "Just a scratch, I can take care of it, you just stay here with Sakura."

That's when the rose haired girl intervenes, she raises her hand like she's in a classroom. "Um, I can take care of it." When they both look at her, she adds. "My mom is a doctor, Sasuke-kun, remember? I can clean and wrap a cut properly, I promise."

"I'm not-"

"Sure, thanks, we'll be right back, mom."

He leads Sakura to his room, and then into the bathroom, and hands her the first aid kit, then takes a seat on the edge of the tub. She doesn't say anything, and he realizes that she does know what she's doing when she reaches for the saline to do the preliminary cleaning of the cut.

He cannot help a hiss, when she applies oxygenated water. "Sorry." She continues to dab at his arm until all there is left is the long red streak of inflamed skin, only then does she reach for the betadine.

"How's that?" She asks after she covers the whole thing with a wide rectangle of plaster. She smoothes the edges with her hands and disposes of the used material in the bin, he inspects her work and nods. "It's good, thanks."

She leans against the skin, and steadies herself with her hands. "Sasuke-kun, if I ask you something, will you answer me honestly?"

He does not shift his gaze from his newly acquired bandages. "If I can."

He hears her swallow. "Are you…are you sick? Is that why your mom is so overprotective? I mean, the cut, the movies last time, the homeschooling-"

"Yes."

She swallows again. "Is it autoimmune or something?"

One side of his lips curve upwards. Smart, smart Sakura. "Something like that."

Her voice shakes when she asks, "Is it…dangerous?"

He raises his head and faces her with a full smirk. "Don't worry, Sakura, you can't catch it."

She scowls. "I'm serious! Is it dangerous to _you_? I mean, I don't know, are you okay? Are you-" She chokes and cuts herself off, her hand at the base of her throat.

It takes everything he has to not go to her, and instead, roll his eyes, like she's being a drama queen. "I'm not dying, Sakura, don't cry, save for when you'll really need it."

She visibly relaxes, her shoulders loosen up, and her breathing picks up to its normal pace, a smile replaces the concerned frown. "I'm glad."

Before he can say anything, they hear a knock from his bedroom door. They exit the bathroom to find his father standing in the doorway. "Sasuke, your mother sent me to," He glances at Sakura, "Inspect. You must be Sakura." He extends his hand, because he is a business man and that is how he is used to greeting people. Sakura at this point, has lost her awe of his house, and so, unlike the first time, manages a greeting that does not involve knocking anything over. She shakes his father's hand then bows respectfully.

"Yes, sir, thank you for having me."

The business man nods his head. "Well met, Mikoto says nothing but good things about you."

This, makes her face redden. "That is very nice of her, sir."

"And your parents are alright?"

"They're very well, Mr. Uchiha, thank you for asking. They send their regards."

"Be sure to send outs as well, I'll leave you to it then." To Sasuke, he adds, "The door stays open."

The dinner goes smoothly, Sakura is a very educated person for her age, and manages quite a few conversations with his father, the older Uchiha is obviously impressed, but it is only obvious to his wife and Sasuke. He asks her about her aspirations for university, and he is even more impressed when she says that she wants to follow in her mother's footsteps and be a doctor.

When the time finally comes for her to go home, she feels like family.

At her door, she does not kiss his cheek, because this time, it is his father waiting in the car instead of his father, she squeezes his hand. "Thank you for telling me, Sasuke-kun, it means a lot that you trusted me. And I'm glad you're alright."

He half-shrugs. "Just don't submit it on wikileaks."

"Sure thing."

Sasuke lies on his bed, arms behind his head, and stares at the key chain Sakura left behind, it is cluttered with unnecessary trinkets that are heavier than the keys himself, a couple of plastic cherry blossoms, a small teddy bear, a fish and a smiley face. He throws it at the ceiling and catches it repeatedly.

"Enter." He calls out when he hears a knock, and does not stop bouncing the key chain, it rattles as the metal objects collide with each other, but the sound does not bother him.

"Sasuke-kun?"

"Yes, ka-san?"

He looks at her to find her leaning against the wall, her arms crossed. "You're not going to let me take you to the hospital, are you?"

"No." He answers. "I am not."

"Sasuke-"

"I'm not going, mom. I'm fine, Sakura cleaned it well, it's going to be fine, all these antibiotic shots, all the good bacteria is gone, want me to end up with chronic diarrhea and constant bloating?"

She wrinkles her nose and he raises and eyebrow in challenge. She huffs. "Is that Sakura's?"

He does not answer the question.

"Mom?"

"Yes?"

"Can I ask you a personal question?"

The bed dips at the edge. "Sure, sweetheart."

He sits up, because it is not the sort of question one asks lying down, ka-san sits closer to him, and says encouragingly. "What is it, Sasuke-kun?"

"Is dad your soul mate?"

The question takes her aback, but he does not regret it, it is something he's been wanting to ask since freshman year, his parents' marriage is a happy one, even he can tell that, they don't constantly compliment each other and exchange kisses when they think no one is looking, but they are supportive of each other, they help one another, together, they raised two kids, one into adulthood, and the other nearly there, one understands the other without there being need for words, the true definition of what a soul mate should be.

"I like to think he is." She finally answers. "For us, it wasn't like it was for you, we didn't receive the brand, so to speak, not all people do, remember I told you it is very rare, but I found the person I was meant to be with in spite of that, and I wouldn't change your father for the world."

"Then what's the point?"

She reaches for the keys and studies the cherry blossoms. "Sasuke-kun, it's okay if you like Sakura, it's great, don't let a few letters get in the way of what you want." Her hand covered his on the bed. "If you grow up and meet this person, then that's wonderful, if you don't, then that's great also. Live your life, if you want to be with Sakura, go for it."

"Then, what is the _point_?" He repeats, almost forcefully.

"Think of it like a GPS, very useful, isn't? Makes your life easier, almost always takes you to the right address, sometimes though, it puts you against a wall. The soul bond, or whatever it is called, is a guideline, you can choose to follow it, or ignore it, whichever feels right for you."

* * *

There is a new student, he is blonde, blue eyed, loud and very noticeably stupid and named after food, three traits Sasuke does not appreciate in a person. He sits next to him because Sakura is sick, and proceeds on a mission to shred his eardrums to pieces. He does not seem to be capable of respecting boundaries, or personal space, and firmly believes that he and Sasuke are bound to be best friends.

Because he follows him around like a lost puppy, Sasuke is forced to have lunch with him, thankfully, he does not have to make introductions, because _Naruto_ introduces himself quite enthusiastically.

"Did you talk to Sakura, Sasuke-kun?" Ino asks, sitting disgustingly close to her boyfriend, Sai.

"Yeah, out with a bad case of the flu, she's probably not going to make it all week.

"Poor forehead, rarely gets sick, when she does, it's like the plague, I'll go see her later, want to come?"

He wants to, but when he talked to Sakura on the phone earlier, she strictly forbid him, in an extremely raspy voice, to stay away from her, like she did have the plague, she said she didn't want him to be sick, and if he showed up, she would kick him out at the door. "Maybe tomorrow."

Sakura does not show up all week, just like she said, and that provides the blond loudmouth to worm himself further into Sasuke's life, with social media messages and invites, -how many times can a someone tag a person they don't know?-, unwarranted physical contact, and loathe to admit it, within a week, the idiot starts to feel like part of the gang.

Monday morning, he meets Sakura at the school gates, she definitely looks like she's had a terrible week, but she doesn't look sick. She hugs him like she hasn't seen him for years. It's a normal day.

Until it isn't.

He doesn't get the chance to introduce Sakura to his new self-proclaimed best friend, until lunch time. True to his nature, Naruto barely gives him time to get the names out, before he's enveloping Sakura in a bear hug.

They hug for a few seconds and then both jump back as if they were burned, both clutching their left wrists. Sasuke knows exactly what it feels like to have your heart stop, so he does not use the words lightly, but at the moment, he swears he feels his heart freeze, his blood turns to ice in his veins.

The world wobbles, and turns black for a second, and he has to hang on to the edge of his bench so he does not fall on his face.

"Ow." Sakura exclaims. "Why does it _hurt_ so much?"

"I don't know." Naruto grits. "Hurts like a bitch."

Ino gasps. "Oh my god, soul bonding!" When people stare at her like she has grown another head, she clasps her hands and continues. "My mother told me about this, look at your wrists, what do they say?"

The pair stares at her in confusion and then do as told, blue and green eyes widen, and then lock with each other.

"Haruno Sakura."

"Uzumaki Naruto."

"Forehead." Ino exclaims. "You've found your soul mate!"

Sasuke leaves because he cannot bear it, not anymore, he slips away in the excitement of Ino explaining about soul mates, black names, red names, and bonds for _life,_ he slips away, and no one can tell. The ice in his veins melts into fire, and he can barely breathe, his lungs fight for more air, and his heart kicks into overdrive. He barely makes it to the men's restroom, throws open a stall door, and collapses on the ground, bent over the toilet, he throws up bile. There is pain, so much pain, all over his chest.

He continues to heave, until there is nothing to eject, until his whole system is clenching on nothing. His vision is blurry and he can barely make out the objects in front of him, he heaves again to the sound of insistent knocks on the door.

"Who's in here? Are you alright?" It is a voice he recognizes. Kakashi's. "Do you need me to come in? Open this door, or make a noise if you're okay."

He tries to respond, he opens his mouth, but nothing comes out except gasps for more air. The door opens.

"Sasuke?" Kakashi kneels beside him, and lifts him upright. "Sasuke, talk to me, what is the matter?" The silver head reaches into his pocket. "Just breathe, I'm calling an ambulance."

"No!" Strength comes from a source he does not know, he tries to hold himself up and wipes his mouth with his sleeve. "N-no, don't."

"Sasuke, you need a hospital."

"N-no." He tries to make the room stop spinning, he focuses on Kakashi's face until there's only one of them, and he wills his breathing to slow down. In and out, in and out. He attempts to stand but finds that his limbs have turned to jelly.

"I'll…I'll be..alright."

Kakashi is insistent. "You need a hospital. If you don't want an ambulance, then let me take you there."

Sasuke is stubborn, but he is not stupid, so he lets his ex teacher lead him to the school parking lot, and into his car. He does not protest when Kakashi calls his mother, and tells him that she will be meeting them there. He is just stepping off the ECG table when she storms into the room.

Her arms are around him in a second. "Sasuke-kun, sweetheart, oh, god, I thought, oh god." She hugs him tighter. "What happened? What's wrong?"

She examines him with her eyes from head to toe for injures. The doctor steps in with a clipboard.

"Your ECG looks normal, son, which is great. From what your teacher described you were having a panic attack, do you want to tell us what caused it?"

Sasuke bends to put on his socks and shoes, he takes his time tying the laces, so that his head is shielded from view when he says, "It's just school and stuff, nothing to worry about, when can I leave?"

The doctor, a sixty-something year old man that has been on his case since the first time he became sick, exchanged looks with his mother. "I'd like to keep you overnight, do a cardiac CT scan, and a stress ECG, just to be sure."

"Absolutely." His mother answers for him. "Whatever you think is right." She adds, at the same time he sighs a tired, "Mom."

She holds up her hand. "No, Sasuke-kun, you don't get a say in this, we'll do what the good doctor said, and that is the end of discussion."

He does not relent. "I'll do them, but why do I have t spend the night? Why can't I just do them now, or tomorrow morning?"

"Observation." The doctor butts in. "Especially after the stress ECG, it would be prudent to keep you overnight, just in case, it is most likely exactly what you said, school can be very stressful."

In the end, between the doctor, his mother and eventually his father, he does not have a choice but to slip into a hospital gown and occupy a bed he absolutely does not need. He jogs on the treadmill with several wires sticking out from his chest, and lies perfectly still on an ice cold gurney inside a big magnetic cylinder.

When he returns to his room, he finds his mother settled on an uncomfortable looking chair. "Don't give me that look, you're a kid, I am your parent, I get to stay the night with you." He rolls his eyes. "Don't you roll your eyes at me, it's enough that I sent your father away, here, Kakashi-san gave me your things."

It occurs to him that he hasn't seen his ex-teacher since Kakashi brought him to the emergency room, he told him that he would linger until his mother showed up, and didn't show his face since.

"He left just a while ago, and he said that he would settle your absence at school with the administration, I signed a slip for a week off."

He is so caught up on the dozen messages on his phone, and several missed calls, that he does not immediately register her words about a week off. Most of the messages and missed calls are from Sakura, one is from Naruto. The last one reads _Where r u? Should I file a missing peoples' report?_

He shakes his head and dials her number, she picks up on the first ring. "Hey!" She exclaims immediately. "Where the hell are you? Where did you disappear to?"

He ignores the ache in his chest, and does his best not to show any outward signs that he is feeling anything but great, because his mother is watching like a hawk. "I, um, I didn't feel well, I left after lunch."

"Oh." She responds. "Are you okay? Where are you? I went by your house after school, there was no answer. Oh my god, Sasuke, are you really okay? It's not the, you know, is it? I-"

"Sakura." He interrupts. "Slow down, I'm fine, do you hear me? I am _fine_ , I am not at home, I am at the hospital."

Pause.

"WHAT?"

He winces and pulls the phone away from his ear. "I said I am fine, remember?"

Undeterred, she continues t yell. "Why didn't you _tell_ me? I've been looking for you all day, I wanted to talk to you about this whole stupid thing with Naruto, and mad at you because you weren't there, and all this time, you've been in the _hospital_? What the hell, Sasuke?"

The mere mention of his name makes Sasuke angry, so angry, he nearly forgets the façade he's trying to act out for his mother's sake. "I didn't exactly have time to call you, Sakura." His mother raises his head from the magazine she's been leafing through. She arches a questioning eyebrow.

"You're right, sorry, sorry. Can I come see you now?"

"It's late, visitation hours are probably over."

"Tomorrow, then?"

"I don't know when I am supposed to be discharged, it might be early morning."

"Oh, I'll call you then."

"Sure, tomorrow."

He hangs up the phone before she has the chance to say anything else and casually throws it on the bedside table, his mother's eyes follow the projectile until it lands on its destination, and then she looks at him again. She tilts her head to the side. "Why didn't you tell Sakura you didn't feel well?"

He shrugs. "She wasn't around."

"Did you have a fight?"

"No." He answers. "No, we didn't."

Tuesday morning, when the doctor steps into his room, Sasuke knows that whatever he has to say, it isn't good, so does his mother apparently, because she reaches for her husband's hand, she hangs on tightly.

"I've looked over the results of your scans, and compared them with previous ones." He swallows. "I'm afraid the fibrosis extended over the majority of your myocardial tissue, Sasuke."

Sasuke blinks, once, twice, and then again for third measure. "And?" He finally says when his mother, who has gone as pale as a ghost, does not react verbally, and his father simply stands there.

The doctor adjusts his glasses on the bridge of his nose. "I'm afraid that means that your myocardial cells are losing function."

"W-what," His mother inhales deeply, almost a hiccup, before continuing, "What can we do, doctor?"

"Normally, I would suggest a heart transplant, however, because of the nature of Sasuke's, um, illness, I'm afraid he is not eligible for the donor list."

"What does this mean?" His father finally decides to contribute to the conversation. "What are we supposed to do?"

"What this means, tou-san, is that no committee on the planet would even consider giving me a perfectly healthy heart, just to have it destroyed by my immune system. When can I get out of here, doctor?"

"Sasuke, I am sorry, so sorry, at this state I cannot recommend your current lifestyle, you need outmost rest, the slightest effort can-"

"Can." Sasuke hisses. "Can, not will, I did perfectly well on the treadmill, I did not keel over, my heart did not stop. Now, what? You expect me to be hospitalized for the rest of my life?"

"There are some facilities that off-"

"NO!" He yells, he is throwing a tantrum, something he has never done before, even when he was told, almost ten years ago, that for some reason, bacteria tended to attach itself to his cardiac tissue and his body attacked said bacteria with a vengeance, destroying his heart in the process; at that point, he wasn't exactly aware of what that meant, simply that he wasn't allowed to play tag, that he wasn't allowed to go to school with all the other kids, and that every scrape, scratch or cut mandated a full antibiotic treatment.

He turns to his parents. "Don't you even think about it! Don't you dare, you're not locking me in some _bubble_ to rot, no."

"Sasuke-" His father starts, but Sasuke cuts him off, he is not willing to even listen to their reasoning. They are considering it, he can tell, in the way his mother looks at him sadly, in the way her eyes shy away from his when he meets her gaze.

"I said no, if you do this, if you _fucking_ do this, I will sue you if I have to, do you hear me?"

"I don't want to see you die!" His mother finally snaps, she wrenches her hand from her husband's grasp and advances on him, she clasps his shoulder. "Is that so much to ask? That I want to keep my baby?"

"What changed? For god's sake, what? We've always known that my heart was a time bomb, now, it started ticking, you've always known that I could go to sleep and not wake up the next morning, tell me, what _has changed?_ "

There is silence in the room. His mother pulls away from him, and stands in the corner, her arms wrapped around herself, his father holds himself rigid, his hands fisted at his sides. And the doctor, the good old doctor, stares with pity practically dripping off of him.

"Nothing." He finally answers. "Nothing has changed."

His heartbeat beats loudly in his ears, accentuating the deafening quiet of the room, he draws his knees up and rests his arms on top. "When can I leave?"

Before the doctor can answer, there is a knock on the door, the person on the other side waits for a few seconds before opening the door.

Green eyes widen when they land on the three adult figures in the room, Sakura's face flushes. "I'm sorry, I didn't know anyone was in here, I'll come back later."

She starts to back away but Sasuke stops her. "It's alright, we were finished, weren't we, doctor?"

The doctor does not hesitate. "Yes, Mr. Uchiha, Mrs. Uchiha, if you just follow me to go over the discharge papers."

Sakura waits until the three exit the room and close the door behind them before moving to stand next to his bed. She has a small basket of cherry tomatoes in her hands, a card inserted between the small red fruit. "You're being discharged, great."

He moves off of the bed and pulls his clothes out of the cabinet. "I told you I would probably be discharged early. You didn't have to skip school to come all the way here." He steps into the attached bathroom to change before she has a chance to reply. In the bathroom, he drops his clothes on the floor, and supports himself on the sink. He waits for his heart rate to return normal before washing his face. He did not think it would be this painful to be close to her, being close to Sakura has always been painful, but it was more of an ever present throb, than a sharp knife between the ribs. He is on fire, his skin, his eyes, his insides, hell, even his teeth feel like they're being held over a torch.

There is this unbearable feeling of a fist closing tightly over his heart, and a tight band wrapping around his chest, preventing it from expanding, depriving him of some much needed air.

He splashes more water on his face, and leans there for a few more seconds, only when he feels capable of standing on his own, despite the pain, does he reach for his clothes.

"Are you mad at me?"

Sakura's voice is muffled through the door, but he understands her words perfectly fine. "No." His voice sounds fake, even to his own ears, and he hopes that she does not catch on. "Why would I be?" It's not like she unknowingly tore his heart to fragments, then set the whole thing on fire.

"Because I yelled at you yesterday? I am sorry, it's just what happened at lunch, I wanted to talk to you about it, and you weren't there, and I got mad because I thought you didn't care, stupid, I know, but then you told me you were in the hospital, and I got mad because you didn't tell." She took a deep breath. ""I'm talking too much, bottom line, I'm sorry."

He opens the door. "Tell me about it now."

She sitting on his bed, tomato basket on her lap, she looks up at him, and smiles. "No, silly, it's not really important."

He takes a seat beside her and reaches for one of the tomatoes, germs have done as much damage as they can, it's not like he has to worry about them anymore, he pops it into his mouth, and reaches for another. "Of course, it is, soul mates, true love, etcetera."

"Don't mock what you do not understand."

He scoffs and easily segues into a roll he's been playing for nine years. "Of course."

She stops his hand when he reaches for a third cherry tomato. "Are you really alright? You're not keeping anything from me, are you?"

He rolls his eyes, and it is not even an act when he says, "You've been watching too many Korean dramas, no, I am fine, just haven't been drinking as much water as I should."

She smiles so widely he can see one of her not-quite-there-yet wisdom teeth. "Alright, then. So, this whole soul bonding thing is weird, apparently it's not that common, I mean, all people have the _brand,_ or whatever it's called on their left wrist, but they can't see it until they meet their match, sometimes they never do!" She takes one of his tomatoes even though she claims she can't stand the stuff, but he knows that Sakura is a nervous eater, and will devour even cardboard when excited. "Did you know about this?"

He shrugs. "Vaguely."

"And the whole living soul mate's name shows up in black, dead, in red, how messed up is that?"

"What do you plan to do about this thing, you and the idiot?"

She smacks his shoulder. "You calling him an idiot does not make me feel better, imagine, my soul mate, double digit IQ." She laughs, a tiny chuckle at the back of her throat. "To be honest, I don't know, I mean, this is _monumental,_ not something you can just ignore, that's like throwing a giant middle finger at fate, or whoever is responsible for this, I guess."

"So don't." Sasuke hears himself saying, and he pretends like it doesn't feel like his eyes are being ripped out through his nose. "Don't ignore it, go for it. Isn't this supposed to be the purpose in life, anyway? To find someone? To build a life with them? You've found your person, Sakura, early, yes, but that just means you have a decade to get to know him, to fall for them, go for it."

Her eyes are wide, lips open. "And if it doesn't work?"

He shrugs. "Then it doesn't, but it will, he's your soul mate isn't he?"

Sakura starts at him for a few moments, then squints. "Are you _sure_ you're alright?"

He rolls his eyes and shoves her off the bed, she barely manages to land on her feet, crouched on the floor, she begins to laugh and takes hold of his left foot, in an attempt to drag him down. That is how his mother finds him, Sakura on her knees, pulling on his leg with all her might, and him hanging on to the bed as if his life depended on it, the sadness in her eyes is temporarily eclipsed by her immense amusement at the ridiculous scene.

"Are you ready to go, Sasuke-kun?"

Sakura releases him and practically jumps to a standing position. "Yeah." He sits up and reaches for what little things he had on him, his phone and his wallet. "Come on, Sakura, we'll drop you off."

As they're exiting, they pass the inoculation ward, full of annoying little children and screaming toddlers, with the occasional senior citizen.

"Hey, I finally remembered." Sakura says, they are trailing behind his parents, his mother half-turns, also interested in what Sakura has to say, he arches an eyebrow in response. "I finally remembered why you and Mrs. Uchiha are so familiar. I passed through here when I came in and remembered, we met, about nine years ago, remember? Tiny little kid, afraid of her flu shot? Your mother kept nudging you to talk to me?"

His mother stops walking so abruptly they nearly slam into her, his father continues for a few more paces before he realizes that he is on his own, he turns. "Mikoto, what's wrong?"

Her eyes are locked on him and Sakura, wide, feral.

"Yeah, I remember."

Sakura frowns. "You knew that?"

He does not take his eyes off of his mother when he says, "Yeah." She knows.

They drop Sakura off at her house, she says that there is no point going to school now that she's missed most of her morning classes, and that her mother would understand and write her a slip.

"So, see you tomorrow?"

He shakes his head. "I'm not coming for the rest of the week."

"Lucky you, chat later?"

"Sure."

The second they drive off, his mother turns in her seat. "Sasuke-kun, tell me it's not what I think."

He fixes his eyes on the window. "I can't tell you that, mom, because I can't read minds."

"Not funny, Sasuke. Sakura, you met, nine years ago, when you got your, oh god, it's her, isn't it?"

He does not answer, which is an answer in itself.

"Then _why?_ "

He lifts his wrist into his line of vision and reads the two words, twelve letters, six syllables.

 **HARUNO SAKURA**

"Because I belong to her, _she_ , does not belong to me."

"Sas-"

"Enough, mom, please, enough." He whispers the last word, because he can't find it in himself to speak in louder, because his voice is just as small as he feels, just as weak, because he is suddenly so _exhausted,_ that he feels something he has not felt in a long time, he feels the prick of tears at the corners of his eyes. Because saying it for the first time, a truth he has known since freshman year but never admitted, takes the wind out of him.

He blinks rapidly, determined to chase them away, one things he is not, is a crybaby, he does not see the point in it, sure, it makes you feel better for a couple of cathartic minutes, stimulates endorphin release and all that shit, but then what? Your problems are still there, you're still a six year old kid who can't play outside, still a sixteen year old who's practically been handed a death sentence, pointless.

But driving home, in his parents' car, Sasuke cries. He knows that his mother can see him, he knows that his father can hear his pathetic wet sniffles, and he does not care. He cries, because those two minutes of feeling better, feel worth it, he hasn't felt better in years, and if two minutes is all he can get, then he'll take it.

At home, he heads straight to his room, he does not take his shoes off at the door, a huge taboo, he mechanically walks up the stairs, he collapses on his bed and wills himself to lose consciousness.

When he wakes up, the sky is dark. He knows that there is a person in the room with him before he can see them, he doesn't have to turn on his bedside table light to know who it is, he does it anyway, and Uchiha Mikoto occupies his desk chair. Her elbow supports her chin on the desk, it's a lazy position, one that she's always scolded him out of.

"You know, when you were born, you were barely the size of Fugaku's hand, so small, so fragile, but you had the strongest grip I've ever felt, definitely stronger than Itachi. It was like you came into life, and you were hanging on with all you had."

He draws his knees up towards him. "Ironic, isn't?"

"Heartbreaking." She counters. "You've been in pain, Sasuke-kun, and I did not see it, it's not just about the soul bonding, is it? You _love_ her."

He does not show any outward reaction, even as his very core is inundated with magma. "So? What of it?"

"If you do, you cannot let some _silly_ tradition dictate the rest of your _life._ So what if she doesn't wear your name? It doesn't matter, it shouldn't. You, and only you, can control your life, talk to her, tell her, _convince_ her, don't just give up!"

"Even if she's been bonded to another guy?" He speaks the words to the far wall, because he can't bear to see the pity he can hear in his mother's gasp. "Even if there is a name on her wrist, and it just happens that it's not mine? Even if everything points to the fact that it is not meant to be instead of the opposite?"

"Maybe, yes, maybe you-"

"I am sixteen years old, mom, I shouldn't be thinking about true love, and soul mates, it shouldn't matter to me! But I do, and it does, I thought about it hard, about how unfair it is, for years, it was all I could think about last night. And you know what I came up with?"

"I didn't care about any of it, before, it was just something that happened, it was just a person that, for all I know, just met once, I didn't want to find her, I didn't need her, until I met her, and even when I knew that she didn't feel the same, I _loved_ her, and yes, I did think it unfair, and pointless, but now I know, if it hadn't been for the brand I wouldn't have given Haruno Sakura the time of the day, she would have just been another girl I sat next to in biology, her name was branded on my wrist so that, even for a short while, I could love her, these few years have been meant for her, but she was not meant for me, because I was not meant to last that long."

"Sasuke-kun." His mother groans out his name as if it hurts, it probably does, as much as he is in pain to say the words he's always thought but never admitted. "Please, don't say that, please, you can't just-, I can't lose you."

He picks his miserable self off his bed, he kneels by his mother and wraps his arms around her waist, she leans over him, holding on for dear life, chest heaving with barely restrained sobs.

"Please, accept it, mom." He can't help but cause her more pain. "One of these days, you're going to wake up and I'm not, I want to know that you'll be okay, after that, I want to know that you'll-"

"How the _hell_ am I supposed to be okay?" Her voice is muffled against his back, the material of his shirt sticks to his back, becoming damper by the second. "How can I let my baby go?"

It is not clear, after that, who is holding whom, who's comforting whom, he holds her and she holds him back, and neither can find it within themselves to let go.

"You know, mom, I think it might be just a little it unfair."

* * *

He does not go to school that week, and when Monday comes, he does not go either, his parents say nothing when it's already eight o'clock and he's still in bed. He does not answer Sakura's calls, his excuse is that he came down with the flu and his voice is too messed up for talking, the truth is, is that he doesn't think that he can keep his act around her anymore, he doesn't think he can keep it out of his voice, it hurts too much.

And so they send messages on messenger, whatsapp, and every other social media platform, about the classes he's missing, about notes, homework, and upcoming exams, and about how Naruto asked her out on a date, how the blond imbecile was taking the whole soul bonding thing well, she talks about the date, about how great it was, about the date after that, and about how Naruto isn't so bad after all.

Sasuke does not have to hear it from Sakura's mouth to know that she's falling for the blond, it's obvious, that's when he knows that he is never coming back, he might be a tough-it-out kind of guy, but he is not a masochist, listening to Sakura gush about her dates, watching the two stare into each other's starry eyes and all that crap would be like slashing up his own arms and holding them out for her to pour salt, acid, and dirt on them.

On the third Monday since his brief hospitalization, his father asks him if he is going to school, Sasuke simply shakes his head and spoons another mouthful of cereal into his mouth.

Sakura becomes suspicious after that, she tells him that she wants to visit, and he says that he is still sick and pathetic, and that he wasn't fit for company, when she insists, he says that he can barely talk and that her visit would just exhaust him. She gives up.

"Is that Sakura?"

His mother asks when she finds him staring at his phone screen on his bed. "Yeah."

She crosses her arms over her chest. "It's been almost three weeks, Sasuke-kun, tell her something, don't leave her hanging, tell her you're not going back."

"I might."

"No, you're not, you're never going back there, I know you. I talked to your school administration, they understand, the teachers will be e-mailing your lessons and homework from now on, and you can take your exams online, if you want to continue, that is."

He merely shrugs, because there is no point and they both know it.

"Tell her something, Sasuke."

So, the following morning, Sasuke catches a ride to school with his father, he waits at the gates. Sakura shows up not ten minutes later with Naruto in tow, they both grin when they spot him, Sakura practically jogs towards him, she throws both arms around him with such force they nearly topple to the ground.

She looks pretty, prettier than he remembers, in light yellow dress, and high heels, she's never worn high heels before, and her hair is half up, half down, as opposed to her usual bun or ponytail. She's putting effort into it, he realizes, for Naruto, she wants to look pretty.

"Hey, man, we haven't seen your face for a while." Naruto bumps him on the shoulder.

"Yeah. Where have you been? Excuse me, but you don't look at death's door, what the hell, Sasuke?"

She surprises him when she hugs him again, with more strength than before. "Never mind, we have tons to catch up on, _you_ have tons to catch up, so much homework."

He resists when she starts to pull him inside. "Actually, Sakura, I'm not back, can I talk to you, just you?"

She exchanges looks with Naruto, then tucks hair behind her ear, nervous. Naruto is confused but he shrugs and goes ahead anyway. Sakura studies his face intently, and he tries to keep it as neutral as possible.

"What is it, Sasuke-kun? What do you mean, you're not coming back?"

He squares his shoulders and shoves his hands into his pocket, his eyes study his shoes as if they are the most interesting thing in the world, because, for all his bravado, he can't lie to her, not to her face.

"I'm moving, abroad, my parents want to me to study overseas, they enrolled me at an elite school." It is easier than he thought to lie, she does not say anything, and he does not look at her. "I'm going, tomorrow."

"W-w-what? M-moving, _abroad?_ What the fuck, Sasuke-kun? What the actual _fuck_?"

The heel of her palm slams into his shoulder and he stumbles back, he does not look at her even as she strikes him again, he hears her bag drop on the floor, and she is now using both hands, alternating between his right and left shoulder.

" _Answer me."_

He can feel peoples' stares on them, Sasuke and Sakura, KHS' top two students, arguing at the school entrance.

"Say something."

"I'm sorry this is sudden for you, it's just as sudden," He swallows the lump of dirt in his throat, "just as sudden for me, too. It's just what it is, I thought you should do."

And he walks away.

It takes immense willpower, not to look back, he wants to, but he spares himself the torture of looking at her, knowing that it is the last time, knowing that she is angry and hurt, and maybe, just maybe, finally just as heartbroken as he is.

With every step, it becomes harder and harder to keep moving, his feet weight more, it's almost like they're strapped to the floor and he has to exercise physical power to lift one. He can feel his heart beating a mad tattoo against his rib cage, he feels pain, burning, pain that conquers his chest and spreads to his every extremity, and still, he walks.

He is drenched in sweat by the time he makes it home, dark patches cover the area above his sternum and beneath his arms, he feels droplets of perspiration traveling down his back, but inside his body is a paradox of fire and ice, fire so hot it makes him shiver, and ice so cold it makes him burn.

Itachi's car is parked in their driveway, he is the one that opens the door for him, he takes one look at his younger brother, and takes him into his arms, sweat and all, Sasuke nearly, _nearly_ , breaks down then and there, instead, he picks himself up, and pulls away from his older brother.

"What are you doing here? School doesn't end for a month."

Itachi's kind brown eyes are framed with barely perceptible crow's feet when he smiles. "To see you, of course, and look what you've done to yourself. Come in, before you catch your death with a cold, and then mother will kill all of us."

The shivers don't stop, and the amber does not cool down, even after he takes a shower, if anything it intensifies.

He sits with Itachi at the dinner table and tells him everything, from the very beginning. Itachi listens, he does not say anything, until Sasuke tells all there is to tell.

"Sasuke," He finally says, "Have you considered that you're making the greatest effort of your life?"

Sasuke scoffs. "Really?"

"Yes, let me understand this, when you didn't know miss Haruno, it didn't matter to you, soul bonding, soul mates, none of it did, I suspect, if you didn't have the evidence glaring at you every night, you wouldn't have even believed in any of it."

True.

"It didn't matter, until you met miss Haruno, and you thought that it would make your life easier, but it didn't, it hasn't and it won't, because very little in life is easy, little brother, you know this better than any of us, the question now," Itachi takes a sip of his tea, "Is why are you letting it govern your life now?"

"I am not."

"You are, you ignored fate completely when it didn't serve you for anything, you embraced it when you thought it would give you what you want, but now it isn't, so surpass it, ignore it, and do what you _want_."

"She has Naruto, now, what does it matter if I go for what I want or not?"

Itachi shakes his head, his usual condescending smile pulling at both sides of his face. "She has known you for two years, Sasuke, while she has known this new person for three weeks, presented with a choice, which do you think miss Haruno will chose?"

Sasuke bows his head, he supposes that he's always known that if he wanted, he could win Sakura over, but he thought it would be pointless, when she was bound to meet someone else, and yet, is it really that impossible to ignore his fate and convince her to do the same?

His mind rejects the thought as wishful thinking the second it crosses it. "Is it fair, to her, when I- when I don't know if I will even wake up tomorrow?"

"Maybe." Itachi counters. "But if your love for her is so great, isn't it worth it to live it if only for a short while?"

It chafes a bit, to know, that as usual, it only takes a few words, literally a few words, from Itachi to get him to do whatever was required of him, be it his homework, his chores, or even, when he was very young, his bath. For the first time, he allows himself to think about what it would be like to tell Sakura, everything, to confess so to speak.

"What is the worst that could happen, little brother?"

The worst thing would be for her to say that she's found her person already, the worst thing would be for her to say no, but wasn't there some comfort to be had, in even that? That it wasn't meant to be, simply because she didn't want him, as opposed to some grand universal scheme that no one even understood.

"Don't be noble, Sasuke. You deserve to be ignoble."

Sasuke knows then and there that he will talk to Sakura, today, he doesn't know what he plans to say, he simply knows that he will tell her the truth and let her do with it what she wanted. If she said no, then that was that, if she didn't, then they'd take it from there.

He does not give himself the chance to chicken out, to think it through, to go over all the reasons he's decided on this course of action in the first place, he glances at the clock, thirty minutes to lunch break, he grabs his phone, and is almost out of the door.

"Wait." Itachi calls out. "I'll drive you."

"No, thanks, but I want to think about what to say, I can think when I walk."

He opens the door and turns, something he does not recognize urges him to speak, to say anything. "Itachi," He starts, "Thank you for coming, it was good to see you."

He walks, determined, to the bus stop, like a forty something year old woman in a shiny pink tracksuit intent on burning some calories, the usual twenty minutes are cut down to half, and he is there before he knows it, it is easy t dismiss the ache in his belly as excitement, or something teenager-ish like that.

He fidgets on his seat, unable to sit still for more than a few seconds at a time, a middle aged man sitting across from him gives him an odd look, and Sasuke returns it with a frown on his own.

He steps off the bus, and it is easy to dismiss the heaviness weighing his feet down as apprehension.

People recognize him in the school hallway, when he passes by them, the straight A student that hasn't showed up for weeks, he feels their stares on is back, catches them whispering to each other out of the corner of his eye, and he does not care, all he cares about is catching Sakura exiting her creative writing class.

He is almost there.

Just a few more steps and he can tell her, a few more steps and he can be free, a few more steps and he can take his chances with the girl that somehow came to mean so much to him.

Just a few more steps.

He sees her, and he sees her seeing him.

Their eyes lock.

A few more steps.

He doesn't make it a few more steps.

It is only when someone screams that Sasuke realizes that he is lying on the school floor, facedown, unable to move with excruciating and constricting pain, pain that he feels even in his finger tips.

He is cold, so damn cold, colder than he's ever been in his life, and feverish at the same time, his stomach clenches and he wants to empty it, but he cannot find it in himself to move a finger, even his diaphragm is weak and immobile, he cannot draw a sufficient amount of air, his breathing is heavy, and so so painful.

He sees shapes and hears noises in the background, several people are talking at once, but he cannot focus on the words, he cannot understand them, there are hands on him, several people touching him.

Someone turns him on his back, faces loom over him, the lights blind him, a contrast against his darkening vision, his name is called from miles and miles away.

"Sasuke, Sasuke, hold on, please! We called an ambulance, hang in there."

He hears someone shout. "Someone get the nurse!"

Sakura is beside him, he cannot see her, he can barely hear her, but he feels her, he feels her arms cushioning his head, he feels her tears wetting his face, he feels her head on his chest.

"Hurry!"

It is getting harder and harder to breathe, and he wonders to himself if breathing is worth the pain. What would happen if he just stopped? He'd die. That wasn't so bad, was it? It takes too much energy to keep his eyes open, his lids are a burden, he resists the comfort of closing them, and wills himself to focus on Sakura.

He can make out pink, green. She puts her hand on his cheek, and out of the corner of his eyes he makes out red as well, bold, red letters.

 _Uchiha Sasuke._

If he could, he would have laughed, he doesn't, he can't, because suddenly, all there is, is darkness.

Tch, so unfair, after all.

* * *

This story was designed to break your heart, if it did then I've succeeded and I make no apologies, :p

So, what did you think? Oh, in case you haven't noticed, it's written almost entirely in present tense, I've always been a staunch opponent of present tense narration on principle, I don't know, it always feels moviescript-ish, but I've been reading some awesome material narrated in present tense lately (Kuriquinn, if you haven't checked her out already, do it, you won't regret it.) and it inspired me to try my hand at it, let me tell you one thing, it is hard, very hard, and even as I was typing it, I did get some move script vibes, but I wanted to challenge myself so I kept going, I don't know, I didn't feel like I got as deep into My 3rd person POV as I like to, anyway, let me know how I did, concrit is always welcome.

Also, I will be publishing this on my tumblr, which I created years ago, but only started using now, it's coccinellebleue dot tumblr dot com, I feel like tumblr offers a more communication friendly platform, so feel free to ask me about anything, and I'm even considering requests for short one shots, anyway let me know.

I guess, that's it for now, feedback is very welcome, so please review.

ps. I know it's very long, and some people might find it hard to read it in one go, but it didn't feel like two-shot material to me.

Also, Sasuke's disease is based on a disease that actually exits, where the immune system confuses the cardiac valves for the bacteria that fixes itself on them, it attacks the whole thing leading to scar tissue, fibrosis, which makes them rigid and less functional, endocardiatis, anyway, I just played with that idea.

Oh, and the title is a rip-off from a goodreads historical romance shelf.

Much love


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